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Post by thecornfrog on Jan 29, 2005 22:19:45 GMT -5
Hey just making my first post on this forun ^.^
anyways...
for the last 7 years of my life friendships have been hard for me. Now and then i would make a new friend but eventually
i would get hurt by then. I consider myself somewhat easygoing and rather open, but i just can't seem to find any good friends. As I prepare to graduate from HS and go on to college I am hoping that things will change.
Anyone have any advice or encouraging thoughts. I'm getting sick of how tough it has been.
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Post by Jsn on Jan 30, 2005 0:39:26 GMT -5
Maybe some more info into what problems you're having would help... Perhaps you're just very unlucky in meeting people you'd be compatible with as friends, or it could be some issue like depression, possibly. Who knows... Do you have trouble talking to people in general? Are you not very social? Or are you readily social and just not getting good responses?
Well, if you're moving into dorms in college, as long as you wander around and see what's going on and talk to people you're bound to find friends there. College dorms are probably the easiest point in life to find short term and life long friends both if you're looking.
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Post by thecornfrog on Jan 30, 2005 2:02:36 GMT -5
Well here's some more info: I am very involved and social. I have done the school plays for the last 4 years, talk to almost anyone that cares enough to listen or let me listen to them Btw I also got about 20 ppl in my senior class playing ddr, but after they got their own stuff i was no longer invited to the parties.  Oh well, i only have a few months to go and then off to college. I hope things will be different there. for some happy news the college i am going to has a ddr club ^.^ thanks for replying |
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Post by Daedalus on Jan 30, 2005 18:42:58 GMT -5
Going through highschool I had almost no friends outside of drumline...and none of them are at the college i am now...just find some "groups" and try to get involved with them...me I joined our College radio station working on the metal show...and that helped for friends, and parties....but all us that work at the radio station... are not plugged into the "normal" social pipeline....but its cool...just find something you like doing...and see if there's a club...or group...or class for it
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Post by Laura Moncur on Jan 31, 2005 22:02:07 GMT -5
It sounds like you're hurt because you are no longer invited to the parties. This may be a big misunderstanding. Talk to the people you feel excluded by. Tell them that it feels like you're being left out and see if it was intentional.
It may have been that they all thought you were invited. Since you started this craze, they probably thought that you knew all about it and didn't need a formal invitation.
It's more likely that they unintentionally hurt you than they purposely went out of their way to exclude you. No matter what, talking to them is your best option.
Worst case scenario, you just stay in this holding pattern until college comes. Best case, they remember to invite you next time.
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Post by korsfarer on Feb 8, 2005 18:13:43 GMT -5
I think this is a universally hard time, high school that is. I have a sister who is in secondary school (I think the equivelent to America's seventh or eighth grade) and she constantly writes to me, as she has no friends...!
My advise to her is that often times when you all leave for university, the high school friends seperate. And they often do not communicate any longer. So, it's not much condolance, but often times, high school friends are not true friends, but aquantences.
It's nice to have friends in high school, but it is not always best for you, because sometimes you recall such and such a person, who you thought was a great friend in high school, and ever since you left, they do not call or write to you! I hope that makes sense.
College, you have a ton more people, and since you choose your college and your major, it seems there are more people who are interested in what you are. So you find people to talk to. People in college seem to be more open minded and accepting of others too! And some of the best friends you may make also may be professors! (I talk to my professors outside of school often!!!) So keep your chin up!
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Post by thecornfrog on Feb 14, 2005 8:51:51 GMT -5
Well i did ask the group i use to ddr with when the next party is and told them that i look foreward to hanging out agian.
They told me the pry weren't going to have one for another week (and then had one yesterday)
But w/e I think it is time for me to move on. I only have a few more months...
thanks for all the support
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supahC
Beginner Mode
Posts: 35
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Post by supahC on Mar 4, 2005 1:53:48 GMT -5
I have trouble making friends too. This can be really hurtful when you want to hang with someone cause youre like thier personlity or have the same interests as them.
First and foremost, you need to be much more important than anyone else to yourself, and hopefully thats the case. Focus on you. What you like and what makes you happy, not what others might like or what you think they want you to do.
I dont know how big your highschool is but mine was really small and that added to my isolation because there were less people around to potentially connect with.
Keep your head up and remember, highschool sucks - most people are trying to impress and be like each other. In college, people are mostly developing and expwho they will become in the future, so you'll be around more mature people who have different priorities.
make sure to make yourself happy!
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